The Auto Show

With the Auto Industry picking up steam, I attended the Detroit Auto Show (officially, the North American International Auto Show, or NAIAS) last month with optimistic expectations.  The last one I attended, in 2010, was almost uniformly abysmal.  Then, I made it all the way through Cobo in 90 minutes, and only 2 cars intrigued me- the prototypes of the Cadillac XTS and Chevrolet Sonic.  This time, I was looking forward to much more.  I read that there would actually be concept cars on the GM stands again.  On into the exhibit hall I went, my modulated excitement the mid-life equivalent of a 1st-grader let loose with 5-score tokens at Chuck-E-Cheese, or a college freshman with a fake ID turning the corner onto Bourbon Street.

If the show was a weather report, overall I'd call it Partly Sunny with a rising barometer.  Apart from the continuing design devolution of the German marques (flame surfacing has turned into I left my s'more too close to the campfire) and the insipid anime visages on some of the Korean and Japanese cars, there were a number of inspiring presentations.  For example, I was happy to see the Fiat 500 Abarth in person:

The black one in particular had amazing lines and looked ready to leap into squealing, rubber-burning action.  The two adjacent cars looked nice, as well.  (cue rim shot)

Back to my disappointment with current German design.  As recently as 2002, most German cars possessed a combination of friendly menace and simple, utilitarian beauty.  I owned one of the first Audi TT roadsters in the U.S.  It was universally sublime in design. It featured a theme of circles, such as the wheel arches, tail profile, even in the cockpit with the air vents and controls. And it valued symmetry everywhere.  Where there were angles, they were right.  It looked joyously Teutonic and it sang to my inner OCD; everything was where it was supposed to be.   Not any more.  The car is still handsome, but the song is over.  Now the angles are acute, the design is messy and rather awkward, and even the classic interior of the original now looks... boring.  Tastefully boring.  Exquisitely boring.  The vehicle looks insincere, as if the designers had to change it solely because a timer went off somewhere.  It's as if the design is held together by an artificial force rather than by nature.  It made me sad, in the same way that I recently revisited a once-beloved classic rock station, only to hear the music that dare not speak its name. 

Chris Bangle seems to get the blame for beginning the descent of German automotive design with his aforementioned "flame surfacing."  I prefer to point the finger at Walter de Silva.  His influence does to my eyes what chewing tin foil once did to my teeth.  Apart from the CC, there is no Volkswagen I can comfortably behold.  BMW is not much better.  While the following two images are virtually identical, one contains a mammal that has been wormed and licks itself because it can, and the other is of a bloodhound:

But BMW is not beyond redemption, because they are also responsible for the Mini brand.  And just beyond the BMW stand this was suspended aloft:

Kamikaze View

This is the new Mini Roadster.  2 seats.  Deployable rear wing.  Another view:

I hear the music begin again.  My heart feels happy.  This is a car on a single-minded mission to make driving fun and to look great doing it.  This is a car to be in along the Cote d'Azur in late May as you glance over at Grace Kelly in the passenger seat, smile, and push your right foot down harder. I can't help it- one more:

This is the true heir to the spirit and execution of the original TT Roadster.  This was my favorite car of the show.  What I particularly liked (and this is a critical test I perform before selecting any drophead), was the way you can crank up the seat height to overcome the captivity of the windshield and feel at one with the sky.  What makes this automobile even more exceptional is that, being a Mini, you can order it in any of a million or so permutations of color and accessory.  The design is not perfect, as the transom is quite square-ish- but the execution within the permissable template is highly satisfying to behold.  Well done, Mini (and by extension, BMW).



Moving along and getting past the VW stand as quickly as I could without setting off a blinding static electricity discharge from the thigh area of my suit trousers, I entered the sector of Cobo occupied by the Japanese manufacturers.  Although there was still way too much of this:

Drooper or Fleegle?

I soon found myself entrapped in the irresistible gravitational field of this concept from Lexus:

I was helpless to get away, like Commodore Decker being drawn into the gaping, giant space Bugle.  The car wasn't truly stunning to me, but it possessed countless interesting bits:

Here, the taillights seem to stretch away into infinity, and the rear surfaces all interplay wonderfully.  It reminds me of the way the wind and water shaped the stone at Capitol Reef in Utah.

I love the silver grille inlay, set back several inches on the bottom surface, like a '50s F1 car.  And the extra protrusion on the outside bottom leading to the wheel arch is just brilliant.  This car had supreme presence.  It evoked the same feeling in me as watching a beautifully restored Maserati come onto an auction block- a feeling of admiration and awe, only without any tinge of melancholy for something past and departed.  And it looked absolutely Japanese.  It caused a feeling of solid optimism inside of me.  This feeling was undermined somewhat when I then came upon the Acura NSX concept, which struck me as completely overwrought and silly.

Next in line were the American Big 3. 

I have no photos to post of Ford's offerings.  I like the company, and I respect their engineering, but their design does nothing for me.  In terms of design, they are the most Germanic of the American car companies.  The designs this year were restrained and relatively tasteful, but bored me stiff.  The supposedly dramatic new Ford Fusion?  I stared at it, waiting for something to happen... but just like at the DMV at 2:45, nothing did.  Nonetheless, at least one automotive publication named it "Best in Show."  I don't watch "Glee" either, so it must just be me.

After I finished my nap, I visited Chrysler, where I was astounded by the wonderful excess of the 300C variants on display (the car's hind quarters now look excellent).  But I really think that the company has aced it with the new Dart.  Alfa underpinnings and this baby-Charger rear end:

Caveat- the R/T version, shown above, looks much better than the other Dart versions on display.  But this appears to be a great small car, and if the Chancellor of the Exchequer in my realm were in future to ordain that this was to be our second car, I wouldn't be found weeping on the closet floor- for long.


Finally, the rest of the photos below are of GM products.  General Motors currently produces the best-designed reasonably-priced vehicles available in the world.  I might have hesitated before making such a comment last year, but seeing the new Malibu in person has convinced me beyond a doubt that this claim is true.  Any company that, when assigned to design a new family sedan, produces this, is truly firing on all 8 cylinders:

Here's how great the Malibu looks: the lens on my camera actually makes the car look less attractive than it is in person (this is the inverse of what is known in photographer's parlance as the Fey effect).  Now, what I next noticed about this vehicle was the unprecedented quality of the entire interior.  Everything felt as good as in an Audi- door panels, dash, controls (almost), trim. 

This is a car that Chevy should not be embarassed to charge $48K for.  I think the LTZ model will list for over $15K less.  So, they've hit the bullseye with a mid-range offering.  What about small?

This is the RS-spec version of the Sonic sub-compact.  It is quite close to the Sonic prototype which ensnared me two years ago.  Turbo and 6-speed means I'd actually look forward to those occasional sudden evening good-samaritan trips to the part of Walgreen's most alien to me.  Okay, what about a high-end sedan?  They have the Cadillac XTS, now in production form:

I spent more time appreciating this car at the 2010 show than any other vehicle on display.  I loved the front end and the overall proportions, even if I wasn't sure about the car from the C-pillars back.  I thought the prototype evoked what a true, big Cadillac should look like.  This production version, however, was a bit of a disappointment.  For some reason, when I see this final product, it reminds me too much of a made-over Buick Lacrosse.  While the back end looks better in proportion than the prototype, the front end has lost its magic- there are two or three concave, sharp creases around the front which detracted from the slightly more substantial and solid bow on the original, and the perfection of the steep profile curve ahead of the front wheel wells has been lost.  And although I wouldn't make this complaint against an Oldsmobile Toronado, I don't think a top-of-the-line Cadillac should have front wheel drive as this car does.  Nonetheless, there is no mistaking this car for any other marque, and unless my deepest wishes were to come true and GM put the Cadillac Ciel into production unchanged from the concept, this is the best big Cadillac since my old Coupe de Ville (look, my father had made me an offer I couldn't refuse).

One last set of Cadillac photos- here is the ATS, or BMW 3-series rival:

This car, though quite handsome, nevertheless puzzled me.  I couldn't picture a particular type of person driving this.  The demographic escaped me.  Secretary/Mistress?  Nouveau Riche Peacock?  Complete Wanker?  No, none of the exisiting BMW customer base came to mind as a likely convert.  Nor did I think any of Cadillac's current ownership would make the switch, as the company has yet to announce either a LeBron James Hoopty Trim Line or a Fat Nose-Picking B*st*rd Going 93 Edition.

I left Cobo sated after nearly 6 hours.  Although my own list of show winners overlapped little with those who make a profession out of such determinations, I believe many automakers have really hit their stride, designing and building all-around excellent vehicles with a great deal of value.  This Golden Age of Cars which is upon us is enough to keep me rooted in the present, and not eternally pining to return to some previous gilded epoch, such as when you had to be able to make little circles with your finger in order to use the telephone; the cops wouldn't arrest you for drinking the entire bottle of Lawrence Screwdriver Mix if you promised to get off the expressway and ride your bicycle straight home; and Heather Thomas had not yet necessitated the invention of the term camel toe.

Introduction

Part of my daily routine is to visit a dozen or so websites and blogs, and I admit to it being a mild addiction; I get cranky if I don't get to read them, just as I can be cranky until I've had coffee.  I read mostly about current events and politics, automobiles and auto racing.  By the end of the day I've added movies, TV, and military affairs to the list.  I'm likely to have consumed something out of a bottle by then as well, and I'm fairly particular about the contents, along with the food it accompanies. 

These are the areas which interest me, so why not combine them into a single blog?

I intend to pontificate about all of the above topics and more.  With genuine fake sincerity, I apologize in advance for the offense my opinions may cause to the weak-kneed, faint-of-heart and apathetic.